


Through Hell With You

by TheLastWitch



Series: The Arcana Game Characters x Reader collections [1]
Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, Asra is a Doting Teacher, Drama, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Relationships, F/M, Julian is Being a Jerk, Portia is Cinnamon Roll, Reader is Fed Up, Romance, Self-Loathing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2018-05-28
Packaged: 2019-05-14 20:29:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14776728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLastWitch/pseuds/TheLastWitch
Summary: It's been a long time since the two of you met.You knew that he cares, but he was being too stubborn to realize it himself.





	Through Hell With You

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this is my first fanfic of The Arcana...   
> And yes,, the title was inspired from Rachel Platten's "Stand By You".  
> Julian is the first character I fell in love with (in this visual novel), so I've been thinking about making one for him. I also hope I can contribute this to The Arcana Fandom and make it more popular!! Here it goesss >.<
> 
>  
> 
> **WARNING : There are some spoilers about the game here. So, if you don't want to know, don't read!!**

You are the Countess’ favorite clairvoyant. Your eyes reflect the brilliant stars of milky way and the blues of the grand ocean. You know how to dress simple yet charming, the attire complementing your natural looks. Not because of your appearance alone does she honor you, you have both enigmatic wisdom and jovial side that amaze other people. You know exactly when to start talking and when to keep a secret, making it easy to manipulate people in any circumstances so that you have the upper hand.

Afterall, you are the great magician’s sole apprentice. A lot of people recognize you as a very talented fortune teller who has surpassed your teacher, Asra. But honestly, you don’t think it’s possible. He is one great magician you admire, and he will always be. You dare not take his position away; besides, you have never even thought of it.

It is indisputable that you really respect Asra, but that doesn’t mean he is the only man you adore. There was this one man who inadvertently swept you off your feet. He is everything in one man; he was generally aloof; sometimes gentlemanly; at other times displayed a guise of bravado, yet fragile; he is self-reliant and rowdy; to sum it up, he is a hopeless dramatic. Despite of that, those qualities are Julian’s charm you cannot resist.

Not just his personality, his good look has bewitched you. The way he let his curly auburn red hair droop on his right eye, or rather an eyepatch, made him look even more striking. It reminds you of a coyote, or rather a red fox. His figure might be lithe, but he could probably carry a roe deer or two. But you ain’t gonna tell nobody; you’d rather swim in a pool of vampire eels than seeing his overly smug face.

You knew that he used to have some kind of relationship with Asra. You didn’t dare to ask anyone about it, especially because Asra somewhat branded him as a taboo subject. You’ve been telling yourself that you are out of your mind, getting attracted with a man whose real nature wasn’t fully exposed to you yet. You knew that he didn’t kill Count Lucio and deserved a clearance of his name, but you couldn’t fully understand him as a person.

 

~~

 

It’s been days since you left the Countess’ palace and ran your shop. Though today you intended to leave your tarot deck and have a picnic with Portia, your best friend as well as Julian’s little sister. You have prepared some lobster croissant sandwiches, the bread pudding you made yesterday and avocado juice. You know better than to bring little food because there is a big possibility that Julian will tag along. Though you feld giddy about seeing him smile eating your special sandwiches, it’s not that you agreed to the picnic solely to see him.

Portia has been inviting you for a while now and you wanted to see her bright up, especially after the last incident when you did a tarot reading for her. The cards told you that she’d be experiencing something unfortunate that day and it really happened. You heard that she accidentally broke Nadia’s favorite glass, which made her feel extremely guilty, even though the Countess wasn’t really mad.

You arrived at the garden pretty early, the spring breeze made you a little bit drowsy. The park laid in the middle of two aqueducts, it is one of your favorite places in Vesuvia. You sat on a log and placed your stuffs beside you carefully. Closing your eyes, you felt the fresh air fill your lungs while listening to the sounds of sparrows.

“(Y/N)!” You heard Portia’s sweet voice from afar.

You quickly opened your eyes and find her waving at you with a huge smile. You were a bit disappointed that Portia didn’t bring his brother along with her, but it was quickly subsided with hunger, since you only had some coffee in the morning.

“I brought some fresh salad and smoked pork!” She beamed at you, the smell of the food she brought made you even hungrier.

“Sounds great, let’s eat.” You ushered her to a grassy spot with a nice view.

Just when you were about to take a seat, you heard a familiar voice, “Sorry for the wait, ladies.”

Your eyes went wide when you saw Julian walked towards you and Portia, carrying a checkered picnic mat with him, a usual grin plastered his face.

“Ilya, can’t you walk faster?” Portia scowled at him, her hands on her sides.

“Ahem. Excuse me? You were running, I was walking.” Julian shrugged his shoulders, before spreading the mat on the grass, “Besides, I was looking for this. A gentleman’s gotta do what he gotta do.”

You just rolled your eyes at his remarks and settled yourself on the mat. Right after that, you took out all the food from your picnic basket. He was silently eyeing your every movements, causing you to blush in nervousness. You quickly shrugged it off so that he wouldn’t notice.

“Impressive. You remembered my favorite, did ya?” Julian wiggled his eyebrows, “Were you thinking of me while making those sandwiches?”

“It’s just a coincidence.” You looked away from him and distracted yourself by conversing with Portia, “I got you bread pudding, by the way.”

“You are the best, (Y/N)!” Portia hugged you before presenting her food, the smell made you drool.

Julian didn’t try to push the topic further, but you knew that he knew. He wasn’t that dense not to know why you stayed at the Rowdy Raven for a glass or two once a week; why you kept on avoiding his gaze in some occasions; why you visited Mazelinka every once in a while; why you involved yourself with him up until now and got tangled up in his mess. He knew it all too well; that’s probably why he’s been acting weird these past few days.

 

You could see Julian and Portia eating ravenously. You tried Portia’s weird looking salad, it was edible, but you couldn’t quite describe the taste. The smoked pork she made was quite delectable, it made you crave for more. More than that, it made you feel delighted to see the man you fancied gobbling up the food you made with care.

“You’d make a good wife, (Y/N).” Julian gave a half-compliment half-joke before taking a sip of the juice you brought.

You looked away, trying to keep your composure, “Flattery gets you nowhere.”

But he bursted laughing after hearing your statement, “That’s (Y/N) for ya. Insults or compliments, she won’t falter. Just the kinda girl I’ve always wanted.”

Portia crossed her arms, her face unamused and teasing, “Well, Ilya, the question is, is she even interested in you?”

“I bet she does.” He whispered into Portia’s ears, but loud enough for you to hear. Portia just grimaced at him.

You pretended that you didn’t hear anything anyway. Just when you were about to change the topic, suddenly you felt something cold and familiar slithered along your back. You turned your head to see Faust on your shoulder. You felt both excited and scared knowing it’s a concrete sign that your master is back. A part of you is eager to listen to his interesting stories about his journey, but another part of you wished for his journey to be very long, so that he couldn’t meddle with your decisions. You felt distressed that you couldn’t meet Julian as you’d like when he’s near. Afterall, Asra didn’t quite like him.

“Sorry guys, I have to go early.” You quickly grabbed your things and stood up, “Catch you later!”

Julian stared at you as you went before turning to look at Portia questioningly. Portia just shrugged in response. Nobody knows where you are going.

Once you reached the street, you started running carefully. You wouldn’t want to drop Faust or make her dizzy. Since you went through the market’s route, you decided to buy a small mint chocolate chip cake and the new arriving double-layer cranberry ginger upside-down cake. You knew Asra is always fond of trying new thing, especially weird ones.

 

~~

 

When you finally reached your shop, you saw Asra arranging his newly gathered herbs on the shelves. They were placed inside crystal clear bottles, very eye-catching indeed. You don’t know where those herbs came from and you don’t wanna know. Learning from your past experience, it could come from a monster’s armpit for all you know.

Asra glanced at you and smirked, “(Y/N), you’re back. I’ve got an interesting souvenir for you.”

You gulped before placing the cake box on the table, Faust quickly slithered down from your shoulders to the table and attached herself on Asra's arms “What is it?”

He took out a black umbrella from under the table and handed it to you. You were puzzled when you received it, but then you knew he’s always good at hiding surprises. So you went outside and opened the umbrella. You were indeed amazed as you saw the stars you can see from the southern hemisphere on the inside of it. When you moved the umbrella, the view changed into the stars you can see from the northern, it was incredibly breathtaking. You couldn’t hold your excitement, you immediately hugged Asra as you saw him. He has always spoiled you and you don’t really mind that.

“This is amazing! Thank you, Asra.” You looked at the umbrella once more as you raised it above the both of you.

Asra flushed and returned your hug, “Well, I’m glad when you are.”

 

~~

 

Later that evening, you visited Mazelinka. You didn’t intentionally come to meet Julian though, especially because Asra has just returned. You have been wanting to give Mazelinka some of unusual leaves Asra got for you. You kept the leaves in your bag, wondering if she would brighten up after receiving your gift. It’s just a short while, but she was almost like a mother to you. She was very caring despite her harridan attitude and she didn’t ask for anything in return. Nevertheless, you were a bit suspicious with her identity, because there was the time when she asked you to buy magical ingredients.

Once you reached her house, you knocked at the door politely.

“Who’s at my door this late?!” You heard Mazelinka’s usual annoyed tone before opening the door. She probably thought that it was the castle guard.

You smiled and handed her the leaves, “I just received some souvenirs from my teacher and I’d like to share--”

“Enough talk, come in.” Mazelinka pulled you inside hurriedly.

You also just realized that your hands are freezing due to the cold wind. You placed the leaves on her table carefully, eyeing her figure disappear to the kitchen. She returned with hot cocoa, not exactly your favorite but it’d suffice.

“What’s the point of giving me those leaves?” She handed you the mug with her usual grouchy face.

You just shrugged, “I personally think it’s pretty handy. As sedative, tonic, remedy, you name it.”

She rolled her eyes, giving you a thoughtful look, “It’s better if ya give it to that boy, he’s been having trouble sleeping.”

After chatting for a while and finishing your drink, you heard the front door creaked and Julian came in, “Oh, (Y/N)! You saved me the trouble. Will you come with me? I want to talk.”

You looked at Mazelinka, wondering if she got something to say before you respond to him.

Yet, she just sneered at you, “A night rendezvous?”

“Ugh, please.” You quickly dismissed that, looking back at him and nodded, “It’d better be a nice place.”

You bid Mazelinka a goodbye and followed him out.

You were a bit surprised when you felt Julian draped his coat over your back, “Sorry to ruin your imagination, but it’s just ol’ Rowdy Raven.”

You didn’t reply. Instead of feeling disappointed, you felt your cheeks warmed as a reaction to his sweet gesture. It also made him blushed awkwardly, seeing you getting embarrassed over what he did.

“So,” You broke the ice after suddenly feeling uneasy, “What do you want to talk about? Do we really have to go to Rowdy Raven?”

It’s not that you don’t like going somewhere with him, but it is certainly NOT a date and you don’t really like the sound of ‘I want to talk’.

“Oh, that. Uhm, I think it’s better to have a nice conversation there, y’know.” He started to overreact, “The palace guards could be out there and it’s pretty cold outside. Besides, we could grab some food and drinks inside, what do you say?”

“Hmm, yeah.” You responsed curtly, obviously not planning hear his overdramatized babble. It’ll never end when you started to take it seriously.

When both of you arrived at the designated place, he guided you like a gentleman to your seat. The tavern was lively and full of probable fugitives. You didn’t mind hanging out at this place. Even though most of the patrons were scary-looking, they were pretty friendly and welcoming.

“Up for a booze?” He took a seat beside you, his head leaning on his hand and eyes on you.

Feeling a bit bold, you grinned at him while mimicking the same gesture, “Why? Are you trying to get me drunk?”

He sheepishly stuttered, his face flushed at your question, “Well, err, That’d probably be bet—I mean, No! That wasn’t my intention.”

You chuckled at his funny reaction, “I’ll have some wine.”

Julian waved his hand at the burly bartender, “Barth, get me some wine and salty bitters.”

You waited for Julian to start talking, but he didn’t his eyes were focused on the Bartholomew’s movement instead. You found him very charming, especially when he’s quiet. That big mouth of his which keeps on going and going sometimes needs a break too. It took you a while to realize that you were spacing out while looking at him pretty obviously. Once he noticed, he raised one of his eyebrows and his lips also moved upward accordingly. It really made you want to punch him and kiss him at the same time.

Once the drinks are ready, he handed you the glass, “Feel free to refill. It’s on me.”

“Thanks.” You emptied the glass in one sitting, resulting your chest feel a little bit warm.

You watched him laugh at your attitude, “The night’s young, (Y/N). We have all the time in the world. What are you hastening for?”

He poured you another glass before drinking his own. You gazed at him curiously, “I can’t believe you often have that nasty drink.”

“This, afterall, is what I deserve, honey.” There, he started again.

His drama is the last thing you’d like to hear tonight. You’re sick of it. You’re sick of hearing him loathing himself even though there wasn’t a need to do so. He didn’t even kill Lucio. He had suffered enough and he should start thinking positively. Even though Asra told you that he loves his own self-flagellation more than anything. But you knew that it’s not true, deep inside he was longing for something comforting and real. He’s just not used to it. He’s not used to being dependent or getting spoiled by someone. One thing he’s good at is being hard on himself and you didn’t like it.

You took a sip of your wine and started to taunt him, “Your stupidity is severe, Julian. I can’t believe you are the doctor who managed to find the cure of the plague.”

You saw his eyes widened at your statement, clearly surprised with your sudden change of behavior.

“Good thing that unlike an epidemic, your indiscretion isn’t contagious.” You sighed before taking another gulp.

“Took you long enough to realize that, (Y/N).” He slouched like a loser, his hand rested on his glass, moving it slightly from time to time, “I don’t know why you’re still hanging out with someone like me. I’ve been meaning to tell you that this whole time, but I-I just can’t drive you away. You have to be the one who walks away.”

“I can’t do that.” You averted your eyes from his, your tone was clearly annoyed, “This might sound cliche but despite you being stupid, I just can’t. I think...  I think I’m too fond of you.”

“What? Uh... Did I hear it right?” He frowned and started stammering after he heard your confession, “You? Me? No, no, no. That can’t be. You must be joking. Wait, I think you’re drunk.”

“Dodge it all you like.” You rolled your eyes before drinking the rest of your wine.

You weren’t drunk, not over this little amount of wine. You knew that he was looking for excuses. He’s always been like that. Therefore, you waited for his answer. He may be denying your declaration right now, but he won’t be for long. Afterall, he’s not that naive. An honest statement or two will surely knock some sense into him.

However, he did not say anything and your patience was wearing thin. You couldn’t bear the silent treatment he gave you anymore. So you rose up from your seat and fetched your coat from the rack. Just when you were about to escape from the tavern, he stopped you in your tracks. His hand was warm against yours.

“I’m really sorry for dragging you into this mess, (Y/N). I didn’t mean to hurt you, but here I was. I’m not good enough for anyone and I could never be. I-I’ll walk you home. This... This will probably be the last time we hit the Rowdy Raven together.” His hand trembled slightly as he held you.

You turned back to meet his eyes and smiled at him, “Okay.”

He did not expect that. He thought that you would not accept it that easily. He looked pale and shaken. Rather than feeling relieved, your simple approval broke him instead. He felt his stomach churned at the thought of losing you. But as always, he couldn’t do anything to stop that. He was not a good person to start with, and it’s better for you to avoid someone like him.

“You don’t have to walk me home.” You tried your best to look all right, hoping that it’d send him away.

He started to panic, his grip on your hand was getting stronger, “I can’t lea—I mean, there are lots of scoundrels outside during this time. You need somebody to make sure—“

“I need to be alone.” Those words that came from your mouth worked like a spell.

It shut him up once for all, resulting him to let go of your hand slowly. You turned your back on him and started running. You ran as fast as your legs would carry you, your tears threatened to leave your eyes. You shouldn’t cry your heart out. At least, not here.

 

You stopped running once you realized that your feet took you to a beautiful garden. It was really dark, but you could see massive amount of white glowing flowers that Julian once showed you back then in the forbidden garden. Once again, something reminded you of him. Almost every corner of the city reminded you of him actually, because you two were partners in crime through and through.

“I’m not good enough for anyone.”

However, the sight of him hurting himself was suddenly formed in your mind.

Suddenly, a pair of wings made from branches came out from your shoulder blades. Beautiful jewels started to bloom from those branches, dangling from below them. The color varies like rainbow, from ruby to amethyst. This is a gift from the arcana cards to you, whenever you cry or in deep sorrow, those wings will appear involuntarily. The good thing is, they will also disappear once you feel better.

Nevertheless, your tears were halted once you face the fountain. You saw Asra’s reflection in the clear water. You didn’t know how long he’s been observing you or how he always come at a two-edged timing. Embarrassment made you instinctively look away from him, but it was of no use now. So, you decided to confront him, being in a vulnerable condition and all.

Your eyes could see concern in his reflection and tone, “What is the matter, (Y/N)? I’ve never seen you cry like this.”

“It’s nothing.” You covered your sadness with a smile, “Don’t worry.”

“We both know there’s something.” Asra narrowed his eyebrows, unsatisfied with your ambiguous answer.

You didn’t know how to reply him; you couldn’t lie at all. His eyes see through everything.

After a short while of silence, he broke the ice with a knowing sigh, “It’s him, isn’t it.”

Your lips were sealed, his words made your body a thousand times heavier.

“(Y/N), I cannot stop you from doing what you want to do, but if I may give you a piece of advice, It’s best for you to stay away from him.” Asra talked as if he was recalling his own experience, “Nothing good comes from him... Or more like he doesn’t even let something good comes near him.”

Asra was right and you knew it very well, too well even. But no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t get him out of your head. It felt like he had somewhat drilled a hole and planted himself deep inside your mind, its roots were firm and you couldn’t pluck it out.

“Asra, I will leave the shop to you for tonight.” You quietly requested to your teacher, “I don’t feel so good at the moment.”

Asra hesitated at first, but he quickly regained his calm composure and smiled, “... Alright, leave it to me.”

 

Just when you were about to leave, you saw a looming shadow from behind and by then you were hugged by a pair of thin arms. You wanted to protest and kick the perpetrator, but you immediately froze when you realized who it was. It was him, it was Julian. He smelt like sweat and salty bitters.

“(Y/N)... What are these?” Julian caressed one of your wings softly.

 _Beautiful_. He thought.

“I thought I told you that I need some space.” You didn’t want to answer him, you glared at him coldly.

However to your dismay, his face was conflicted and his voice cracked, “I know that you have every right to be mad at me, but... I-I don’t want you to leave me, (Y/N).”

“JULIAN,” You slightly trembled, but you managed to shove him away and gave him an earful, “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, BE DECISIVE AND STOP CONTRADICTING YOURSELF!!”

He was a bit shocked that you yelled at him, but he realized that his attitude was indeed annoying and deserved to be yelled at.

“You... You’re free to do what you like as an independent person, but you chose to keep on hurting me and yourself!” Your tears threatened to flow, you tried to keep it in, but the dam broke once again, “Why did you do that...? Where’s your common sense?!”

Julian couldn’t take it anymore. Making you cry is the last thing he wanted to do. He’d like to drink all of your tears and see you smile. He didn’t know that you’d be this hurt, that you’d be this miserable without him. He hugged you with more strength this time, not leaving any opening to break free.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N). Please forgive me.” He chanted it over and over, hoping that it’d calm you down.

“You’re such a...” You cried and sobbed in his embrace, finally giving up.

Your legs felt like jelly and you let yourself fall to the ground. Julian somehow managed to catch you first and helped you sit properly, he followed right after.

Julian gave you a troubled smile, cupped your cheeks and planted a kiss on your forehead, “I’ve never given it much thought, but the idea of going back to my ol’ boring days without you makes me scared.”

Your tears stopped not long after he admitted his true feelings. The pair of wings had also disappeared into thin air. It kind of surprised him, but he’d save his questions for later. You turned around so that he was facing your back, then you leaned against his chest.

You imagined him being locked inside the palace’s dungeon in search of the plague’s cure. Being accused for the Count’s murder and so he ran away, going on an adventure where no one knows his real identity, and he couldn’t let anyone gets too close to him, including himself, “... It was lonely, wasn’t it.”

“No, it wasn’t.” He took a glance at you before his eyes went back to the dark sky, “At least that’s what I thought before I met you.”

“Then, don’t push me away.” You forced him to look at you, “Let me stay with you.”

“Heh. You’re always up for something dangerous,” For the thousandth time, he gave you a vague answer.

You won’t let him though, this time you’d get the answer straight out of him. You pulled his collar and asked him commandingly, “Is that a yes or no?”

“Y-Yes... Okay,” He seemed to be caught off guard, too surprised at your impulsive behavior.

“Good.” You smiled and hugged him tight, “I hope you work on your honesty.”

“Oh? You’d be surprised,” His usual grin returned to his face, “And I’m gonna get into trouble.”

“What? Being honest isn’t a crime.” You protested as you heard his weird remarks,”Moreover, it’s gonna save you from suspicion.”

“Are you sure?” He shot you a mischievous look, “Then tell me, what should I do with this wicked drive of mine?”

“Wicked drive?” You raised one of your eyebrows, “What is it that you’re trying to imply?”

He yanked you closer to him and grabbed your wrists firmly. As a guy, he was strong enough to immobilize you, even though he was a slender one. Then he inhaled sharply at your neck, trying to rob your scent away and bit at the crook of your neck. You winced in response and tried to wriggle away, but he wouldn’t let you.

“You don’t know how I desperately tried to keep my hands to myself,” Julian whispered huskily into your ear, “I keep thinking about you every night and the thought of not being able to touch you in reality killed me.”

“Huh? What are you—“

He proceeded to suck and lick the bruise he gave you, drawing a whimper out of you. Using your helpless figure as an advantage, one of his hands travelled down your hips while his lips gave you a trail of kisses down to your collarbone.

“J-Julian, this is very inappropriate...” You looked away, trying to spare yourself from further embarrassment.

His eyes went wide as he freed you, promptly realizing that he had crossed the line.

“Sorry,” His face was just as red as yours and to his ears, even, “It’s the first time I lost my control like that... Are you mad?”

You wanted to complain more, but he was too adorable right now. Besides, it wasn’t like you didn’t enjoy it.

“No, I’m not mad, it’s just... One at a time, okay?” You cleared your throat and touched the area where he kissed you nervously, “We’re not even... Lovers to begin with.”

“Then how about we make it official?” He quickly recovered from his embarrassment and took your hands in his, his grey eyes were looking deeply into yours, “I love you, (Y/N). Will you accept this nettlesome fugitive as your partner?”

You stood on your toe and pulled him into a soft lingering kiss, “Yes.”

When you were about to pull away, he instinctively grabbed your chin and kissed you hard, it was very passionate making it difficult to breath.

Once he released you, you couldn't help but giggle, pressing your cheek against his chest, "Should I call you Ilya from now on?"

"Julian is fine, but you can call me whatever you'd like..." Julian caressed your other cheek with his fingers, "Except Jules."

Right, you know better than to call him Jules.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it ^^ This thing has been a draft for quite a long time and I've finally published it! Julian is kinda too retarded here but oh well...
> 
> Oh! Maybe I'll write Asra/Reader fic if I have the time~


End file.
